I have to say that after last night's wretched defeat of my beloved Tar Heels, I wasn't very much into doing much today. Maybe it's even a little bit of shame or guilt- I may have jinxed them myself! But, mostly, it's exhaustion. Work has been difficult to say the least, and some days, you just need to sit back, relax, do some laundry, cook a couple of good meals, and just sit around.

A typical raining Sunday, so we didn't get the chance to do much gardening now that the ground is thawed. We planted dahlias, and peonies yesterday. I also planted some potted freesia and gladiolas, mainly to supply my demand for fresh flowers in the house. I'm excited for these bulbs to come up, and to see if my roses from last year made it through the bitter winter here in Minnesota.

My coworkers keeps saying to me that I'm an "official Minnesotan" now that I've lasted a true Minnesota winter. I hate that they think that of me. I didn't survive anything. I was in Hawaii for two weeks, and North Carolina, and Floria and New Orleans and Philly. It doesn't exactly say much of a true Minnesotan when I travel whenever I can to get the hell away from here.

I was chatting with my long lost friend and colleague Nate the other night, and he has family up here. He can't believe I don't love it here, but then I think to myself, why would I love it here? Home is where the heart is, and true, my husband is here, but that's it as far as family goes. I believe there is more than a permanent address to determine where you live, and if that's true, than I live everywhere else than here.

Thinking ahead, I cannot wait to leave here, and it's felt that way for me since day one. Let's be honest, at first I was homesick and lonely, but now it's more that I miss the type of people I used to find myself with are are endangered animals up here. People who were fun loving but not insane, who enjoyed lazy afternoons and that thought winter was the season we got that one freak snow storm. I miss the comfort of knowing people I saw around town, and feeling like I belonged, that's what I miss most.

This Sunday afternoon at home makes me more and more aware of these feelings of "not belonging" here. We've carved a niche for ourselves with our home and workplaces and hobbies, but I cannot say with a straight face that we've exactly established our lives here. Both Dan and myself seem to be in a holding pattern, waiting to exhale when we move and people are more like us, and the weather warmer.

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